Clash of the titans!

Title: Clash of the Titans
Written by: Travis Beacham, Phil Hay
Director: Louis Leterrier
Cast: Sam Worthington, Ralph Fiennes, Jason Flemying

Ever wondered what it might be like to be the biggest bad-ass, ridiculously good-looking and yet the most humble guy in town? Sam Worthington gets to find this out when he steps into the role of Perseus in Clash of the Titans.
The film is set in Ancient Greece, where Gods bang your wife if they don't particularly like you, and wipe out your city if you prefer mankind to Zeus and his crew. Basically, the Gods have become fed up with Man's insolence and lack of respect, and so Zeus allows Hades to whip them back into order. Perseus and his family have a front row seat to Hades' show, and like a drunk gay man in a club, they get to close. Perseus' family is killed, sending him on a quest to destroy Hades (seriously). The narrative is solid, but you'll see the ending from the moment Sam screams to the heavens in insincere torment at his families fate. Worthington has a simple character to play (Perseus is pretty much perfect) and so isn't given much room for a stellar performance, but what he does produce felt far too much like a classics professor living out his wet dream of battling mythical beasts, bedding women, and colluding with weird freaky desert people. The story has it's predictable array of gimmicky supporting characters, as well as the standard tragedy and smattering of general boo-hoo-ness that accompanies every epic, and very little was done from a filmmaking point of view to achieve anything that could wow anyone. That being said, I had to briefly leave the cinema at a point to change my pants, because I quite literally wet myself at the films aesthetic qualities. The special effects, along with the general scenery are breathtaking, and you will probably flinch every time a giant something or the other breaks down a building in slow motion. Clearly built for 3D viewing, Clash of the Titans builds upon Avatar's success with special effects, and just as seamlessly blends actual scenery with green room work. This film isn't what I would call “good”, but it can definitely be termed “epic”. It is for this reason that it gets...

7 Hoers!

Jame "and the" Van Der Riet goes on!